Tuesday, July 11, 2017

A Love Letter to Self


Dear Jen,



Its been 36 years that we known each other though sometimes we doubt each other - capabilities, strengths and even our feelings towards situations, people and even to our own. We been together from the start, you heard my first cry and saw the first tears on my eyes You are with me on my first step and even on my first fall. You witnessed how I tried to get all my achievements in life - its not easy by the way especially to live on the expectations of others and more harder to stand on your expectations. But we surpassed it together through the help of our Maker.


Its been more than three decades but I seldom thank you for what you've done. Sometimes I forgot to appreciate and admire you and to tell how much I love you. If there's one person that should care and love you more than others, it should be me. Forgive me if sometimes you whisper to me to stay away from those people who will only cause me pain but I still insist to be with them. Forgive me if there are times that you want to take rest from a busy schedule but I still insisting that I should, I must finish everything within the day. Forgive me, if instead of listening to you I listened and cared first to other people. 
Through the years we're together I learned a lot . I thank the people who molded us, people who been our guide and inspiration to go on with life. People who are not selfish in giving their admiration and care. 
As we continue to step forward, always remember that I love you and I will always care for you. Our battle is not yet over. We still have fears to conquer and struggles to win.  Don't be afraid of what future will bring us, our God, our Savior is always with us. Let's just keep the faith in Him and continue the good fight of faith.


Stay strong...
You are loved...
You are cherished...
You are beautiful..
You are a daughter of a King...
And therefore no one can harm you.


Love,
Jen

Monday, May 22, 2017

Stuck in the Lift


May 21, 2017, around 11:20 pm after YAM in the church, feel so tired physically but my heart and spirit are fully recharged of His words and encouragements.
The topic on the service is about Mastering Emotions: Conquering your fears with the Lord. I didn't expect that at the same night, last night I will be able to apply what I've heard. I was stuck in the elevator. Tuwang tuwa pa naman ako kasi naka-zero so I will not wait for that long. I pressed 3 then wait to go up while browsing my phone and after a minute I stared at the screen since naramdaman ko na parang hindi nagli-lift, still on zero. I keep pressing the number but di sya nagfufunction, I pressed the open button but its the same. I keep on praying - Lord na-stuck po yata ako. The first that I asked sana Lord wag magblackout sa loob and I asked Him to give me peace and calmness. I saw a mobile number of the guard on duty and he anwered. While waiting for help I keep reciting Isaiah 41:10 "So do not fear for I am with you". I was reminded also by what we have discussed in YAM - where to look when you are in fear. I called my siblings in YAM to ask prayer and its one way also to have someone to talk with so I will remain calm. After I think almost 15minutes the elevator was forcefully opened. The struggle in getting up from inside (yung parang nahulog ka sa balon na kelangan mong umakyat). Thanks to the lives of AMNCO security guards in our compound, they responded fast. The first attempt to get up was failed, maybe dahil na rin sa ilang minuto na ako na nasa loob at kulang sa oxygen parang wala na akong energy pa na umakyat. So I asked them to get a chair, so after na makakuha ng chair I tried pero di pa rin, so one of the guard go down inside the elevator and after few attempts, I was up. 
Ang bilis ng application ng lesson about mastering emotions :-)
God is good all the time. If we will seek Him and run to Him first, everything will always be fine.
Glory to God